I Want to Adopt, But... by Honey Malloy   Nearly every day, I hear these words: "I want to adopt, but..." I hear them from precious people at the grocery store, at the mall, and at church who see my adopted children and share their tender hearts with me for adoption. This series intends to shed light on the barriers that often keep people from moving forward.

I Want to Adopt, But....

I Am Not Hearing God's Voice.

 

We live in the age of distraction. Many of us connect the dots of our lives from one text or tweet or Facebook post to the next, in some cases suspending activities or interrupting others to issue urgent replies. 

 

In this age of distraction, do we listen for and hear God's voice with the same urgency? 

Time and time again people say to me, "I want to adopt, but I am not hearing God's voice." We are in good company if we have ever had the same thought, that we just aren't hearing God's voice. Maybe it's the distractions in our lives that keep us from hearing it or maybe it's something more.

 

Author and speaker Priscilla Shirer (who's also the daughter of pastor Tony Evans) has shared that she spent most of her Christian life in a "one-sided" relationship with God. She spoke to Him without ever feeling like she heard from Him.

 

"In prayer, I talked, and He listened. I approached my Bible reading as an opportunity to learn about God, while never anticipating and expecting that the God of the universe would really speak to me about the personal details of my life." 

 

God promises in Scripture that if we search for Him, He will make himself known. God issues an invitation in Jeremiah 33:3, where He says, "Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come." 

 

But here's the catch. We must live expectantly, anticipating His reply once we've asked something of Him. When we were prayerfully considering the adoption of our third son, my husband and I prayed for God's confirmation through His word first and foremost, through the Holy Spirit, and through situations He presented.

 

And God delivered all of it in unmistakable ways. During quiet prayer time and Bible reading alone in my minivan one morning in a store parking lot, God confirmed the sex of our soon-to-be adopted child through a passage of Scripture.

 

When I had called out to Him for very specific direction, He reminded me of Psalm 127:3, a verse I had memorized in my Bible as: "Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him."

 

But as He would have it that day, I only had my daughter's Bible with me in the car. When I searched for the Scripture in her Bible to pray over it, I drew a quick breath when my eyes took in her version. "Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him."

 

When we are considering matters as lofty and life-changing as adoption, we must steal away to find Him. Maybe that means fasting from technology or television for a weekend. Maybe it means suspending the pursuit of one of our passions for a time until we hear from Him about adoption, if that's on our hearts.

 

Before Lilias Trotter became a pioneering missionary for 40 years in Algeria, she struggled with choosing between her ministry and her passion for art. Her words spoken in the late 1900s capture the struggle we face today.

 

"Never has it been so easy to live in half a dozen harmless worlds at once...And between them we run the risk of drifting about, the good hiding the best." 

 

Even when our distractions or intentions are good, they can veil not just our best for our lives. They can bury God's best for us until we accept his invitation to ask Him.

 

I Want to Adopt, But...

I Never Move Forward with Adoption Plans

 

Talk to most people about adoption, and they will tell you the same thing: "I've thought seriously about adoption; I'd love to do it, but I've never really done anything about it." 

 

Many, many people would love to adopt. But a recent national survey of family growth shows very few people ever actually do. The study reports that only 1.1% of women and 2.3% of men in the U.S. have adopted a child, according to study results posted on adoptivefamilies.com. Staggering isn't it, when we consider how often we hear people say they want to create forever families for children.

 

What is it that keeps us from embracing adoption once we've confirmed God's call on our hearts to move forward? Fear often immobilizes us, rendering all of our plans just that...plans with no hope of becoming realities.

 

Maybe the answer is closer than we believe. Priscilla Shirer, Bible study author and speaker, writes:

 

"God is the God of right now. . . He wants us to focus on what He is saying to us and putting in front of us right now. The Enemy's voice will focus on the past and the future while the voice of our God will focus on today. He is the God of right now."

 

Right now, is God confirming your direction as it relates to adoption? Is He directing you to do something today that will begin the adoption process? Is He speaking the same direction to your spouse?

 

Author Elisabeth Elliot offers sound advice. "Do the next thing."

 

Her words rattled through my mind this past spring when, after five months of prayer, I secured new fingerprints for our third and final adoption. At the time, I didn't even know if my husband and I were officially adopting again. But God's quiet voice kept speaking to me, confirming I should renew the prints.

 

When I stood waiting in line at the Sheriff's department to be printed, I rehearsed what I would say if someone asked why I needed the prints. You see at that moment I couldn't really say that my husband and I were definitely adopting again. We were still prayerfully considering the option. I could only say that this was the next thing, and I wanted to obey His leading.

 

Even in the midst of our everyday lives, we can go forward with the next thing for adoption, whether it's calling an adoption agency or conducting online research or attending an adoption meeting. "We often find God's will when we do what's next and obediently respond to the normal duties of life," Shirer writes.

 

Whatever it might be, let the next thing God is asking of you really be your next thing. Respond with urgency to His leading. And carry on with life while awaiting Him.

 

Sources:

Priscilla Shirer, Discerning the Voice of God: How to Recognize When God Speaks (LifeWay Press, 2006) pgs. 8,  90.

Noel Piper, Faithful Women and Their Extraordinary God (Crossway Books, 2005) pg. 46.

Elisabeth Elliot, A Slow and Certain Light (Wordbooks, 1973), pg. 87.